Muscle Beach Party (1964)

The Beach Party series was always a mixed experience, even back in the day. Audiences never knew what to expect with these movies. While they weren't always the best ,at least they were often unexpected! Although I can't help but wonder if the teens got a bit impatient with these films, and yearned for them to just focus on sun, surf, and sand, like all the ripoffs!...

Teens Frankie and Dee Dee and all their friends are back on holiday, and raring to go to the beach again to have some fun. They soon find some intruders there, as a bodybuilding group has taken up residence on one side of the beach. The two parties don't get along, and almost come to blows numerous times. Also in the mix s a millionaire who's just floated into port, and the sexy Contessa Julia, who has her eye set on Frankie...

Muscle Beach Party starts out alright enough, but didn't impress me a whole lot. As it went on it gets better in some ways, but worse in others. First and foremost is the plot. It's ostensibly about the teens facing/squaring off against these bodybuilding intruders on their turf. Already a pretty tenuous plot considering these bums don't own the beach, and the muscle gang are pretty much doing their own thing, but oh well. What's frustrating though is that whole swaths of the film completely ignore this story, and  kept going 'Oh yeah' when it came up again.

The first big intrusion into this plot comes in the form of eccentric] millionaire S.Z. Matts and his hot Italian ward Julia. It's them who interact more with the bodybuilders, and when they're offscreen, the = have more than enough character to sustain their own scenes without Frankie and the gang.

When we do finally cut back to them, they're a pretty vapid bunch. The movie does them a disservice, really. I don't mind these dopes being treated as an afterthought, but if only they were written as more = and dynamic, maybe they wouldn't get upstaged in their own darn movie!

The other plotline (yes, there are that many) is Julia falling for Frankie, and trying to spirit him away to become a famous pop star. This is perhaps the best storyline in that it at least has a clear beginning, middle, and end, and we clearly understand where everyone is coming from.

The movie flits from one subplot to another at will, sometimes devoting enough time to them other times not. There's one bizarre scene where the major altercation between teens and muscle the entire movie has been building up to (theoretically anyway) is immediately sidestepped by someone going "Surf's up!", and everyone goes surfing for [5] straight minutes.

Perhaps the most unwelcome element to some might be the way everyone gets on Frankie's back, wanting him to do something with his life rather than bum around the beach all the time. I agree with them of course, but this isn't real life, it's a movie, goshdangit! This kind of story could work well in other places, but not in an escapist movie like this. I thought this was meant to be fun! Who watches a fantasy beach party movie to see lectures on doing better things with your life than wasting it on a beach?

The writing in Muscle Beach Party is middling ,with some moents not being the best, but others being well-crafted. The humour lands a fair bit of the time, and one scene was very funny. There's a great exchange of puns/retorts with Dee Dee and Julia, though it becomes too much by the end. You can have such a thing as too many puns, guys!

Muscle Beach Party is the second entry in the series, and its place in the canon is alright enough. The tone is dead on, with this film capturing the spirit of the series to a tee even if it's not the best of movies. We've got all the familiar characters, and all the new ones impress too (more on them below). There's sadly a few absences though. Eric Von Zipper and hit Rat Pack are sorely missed, even though they only would've added to an already bloated film. At least it'd be more entertaining with them!

Frankie is a pretty scummy lead character, although he eventually learns his lesson and stops cheating on his girlfriend. Dee Dee is by no means a doormat, and t's nice seeing how little crap she takes from her 'Bluebeard' of a boyfriend. The others like Johnny, Deadhead, and the amusingly named bikini girl Animal have decent roles, with their share of comedy moments, serious ones, as well as sexy in Animal's case.

The muscle gang are pretty funny. They don't do anything but stand around silently, but trust me when I say they do it really well! The two girls do too. I don't know what it is, but they really nail an amusingly stoic nature that = their scenes. Their coach meanwhile is manic, sometimes to the point of annoyance, but he's mostly fine.

Lastly there's S.Z. and his crew. He's a likeable character. He's spendthrift enough to wanna casually buy Sicily, and to =, but he's never an idiot, and he's genuinely [likeable]. Contessa Julia, probably the closest thing the film has to a [villain], is delightfully = and playfully devious. She's got enough = and flippancy to be =, while having enough humanity to not be a villain, even if she is doing the bad thing.

The acting here is all fine. Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello make for good leads. They share good chemistry, even if they do spend most of the movie at each-other's throats. He's your typical teen idol, and she's sexy! She's thankfully actually dressed for the beach this time, rather than being forced in a distinctly unsexy = outfit.

Italian bombshell Luciana Paluzzi (of evil Bond Girl fame) is great as the sultry Contessa. Equally neat/nifty is her fashion sense, including a gender-bending sailor outfit! Don Rickles is funny as the crazy coach. He's almost a bit much in some scenes, but he's good for the most part. The standout actor in Muscle Beach Party/this was surprisingly Buddy Hackett! Now I like him already, of course, but here he does more than act funny, stretching his dramatic muscles too, and it works really well. It makes his character feel well-rounded.

Everyone else does well (although I wanted to punch Morey Amsterdam on occasion), and there's an amusing surprise cameo later on. Doesn't make that earlier scene any less weird though, bloody hell!

This film is shot well, with the beach and everyone on it being staged nicely. The surfing scenes aren't the best, thanks to the obvious green screens, but it's not the worst. There are some quite pretty shots here on occasion, namely whenever the beach is filmed at night, and we can see the setting sun off in the distance.

The music in Muscle Beach Party is alright, though very imbalanced. After the first number, it takes another 35 minutes to get another one! Then we get a couple in a row. The worst scene musically is in the nightclub, with Dick and the Del-Tones. Their song is fine, and starts off with plenty of attention, but is suddenly relegated to the background, interrupted by Frankie and Dee Dee's romantic squabbling, before their own song starts...and immediately ends again! Then we're suddenly dropped into the title song, halfway through and constantly talked over.

The rest of the tracks are pretty ok. My favourite performance was from 'Little' Stevie Wonder, who this movie introduces, while my least favourite was Annette's, which was a bit echo-y, her singing wasn't that great,  and it kinda fizzles out.

The end credits of the film also annoyed me. Rather than just playing one song over the credits as they roll, we instead get lots of snippets from various different songs, and dialogue from earlier. It's a weird mishmash that never really pleases the ear. If only they'd just picked one and stuck with it!

Muscle Beach Party is a flawed film, that never truly settles down to figure out what it wants. It's kinda like Frankie in that regard. If it had've just focused on one or two things it might've succeeded, but it tries to do so much that it fails at everything to an extent. This is never bad, and leagues better than Dr. Goldfoot, but it's not the best the series could be...

Balkan Spy (1984)

Hardworking but poor Yugoslavian Ilija was recently called in by the police to answer some routine questions about his tenant, Petar. They tell him things are fine. Naturally this makes Ilija think Petar is a spy of the highest order. Why else would the cops say this was nothing important? Feeling it's his civic duty to investigate, Ilija begins spying on the unsuspecting and entirely innocent Petar, his paranoia growing and eventually drawing in his unstable brother Djura. Together they progressively up their game until it seems like all of Serbia will know about this plot before the 'spies' do!...

Balkan Spy starts off seriously, showing the frustrations and fear of living in a society where the slightest wrong question can spell doom for an already tenuous existence. But then a change comes over the film. We suddenly realise the police here are entirely honest, and it's Ilija who's the one chasing shadows, getting more and more unhinged as the film becomes funnier and funnier.

The movie is a series of comedy scenes that progressively amp up as Ilija and his brother begin to break more and more laws as their plans get crazier and crazier. The story itself is basic, in a good way, and is a great vehicle for getting all these scenes across, without the plot being too complex.

The comedy here is great. The dialogue is frequently hilarious and biting, just about everyone is the butt of one joke or another, and the setpieces made me laugh out loud at times. Everyone delivers these lines with such straight faces that it's a joy to watch.

Balkan Spy is made by its characters, namely Ilija. He doesn't know it, but he's really the title/titular character, not poor Petar! He starts off likeable enough, and you feel bad for the guy and all he has to put up with. Then he starts crossing a few lines, and then he becomes downright unhinged/deranged, and you can't help but laugh at either how badly or how well things turn out for him.

Something I like is that he's not just one-dimensionally crazy, but rather the film explores his psyche and backstory, creating the portrait of a man who genuinely thinks he's doing the right thing, and will go to any lengths to protect his country, regardless of how absent the threat really may be.

His brother Djura starts off seemingly normal, but gradually reveals himself to be just as crazy as Ilija, if not more, and the two brothers prove to be very bad influences on each-other!

Ilija's wife Danica starts the film as a long-suffering wife and ends the film as one, though in different ways. It's interesting watching how she reacts to her husband's deeds]. Their daughter Sonja is much more levelheaded in comparison, and quickly sees that her father is in need of help. She's likeable enough, though doesn't appear much, eventually just disappearing in the last half hour. And lastly, Petar is a random dude, who gets his own perfectly normal subplot, completely at odds with the paranoid story cooked up by his stalkers.

Balkan Spy isn't just a comedy, but also has some interesting messages, and neat symbolism. It's never too on the nose, nor too oblique/opaque. The most impressive moment for me was the climax, which is made up of a long monologue where Ilija espouses on his politics. It's fascinating to watch, and really gives the character life.

The acting here is great. Bata Stojkovic makes the film as the demented Ilija. He really sells everything about his character, and you buy everything about him. It's no wonderhe's one of Serbia's most loved actors. Zvonko Lepetic is funny as the lunatic Djura, with my only complaint being he looks so much like Bata I kept getting them mixed up in some scenes (though that's made up for my some hilarious moments). Mira Banjac juggles her character's various moods well, while Bora Todorovic and Sonja Slavic are good as the normal people.

The music here is quite nice, with its traditional music, and choir tracks providing a good mix/counterpoint with the comedy spy antics, and the increasingly black comedy,

The direction by Dušan Kovačević impressed me too. Many shots are well framed, and very creative

If you happen to be of the opinion that Yugoslavians/Serbians are crazy, Balkan Spy will not help alleviate that (at all), but will deliver a wickedly funny comedy that'll leave you thinking long after it's over...

Çam Sakızı (1974)

A lot of Turkish singers would often throw their hat into the ring and making movies as an extracurricular activity. Back in the days when anything went and there'd be a hundred movies released a week, Turkish performers sure had plenty of opportunities!

Mihriban is a young single mother, forced to support herself and her young son on her own, holding down a decently successful singing gig at a nightclub while her light-fingered child secures a little 'extra funds'. One day she's visited by lawyer Adnan, and after a brief scuffle where she assumes he's here to arrest her, he explains that he was sent by the ailing business magnate Hulusi, who seeks to find his = descendant. Mihriban goes to get acquainted with the grumpy but amiable old man, and soon discovers a plot against him...

Çam Sakızı is a great example of classic Turkish rom-coms. While it's pretty cliched by any country's standards, this never gets in the way of the enjoyment/
Çam Sakızı is a typical Turkish romance. It's mostly entertaining, and presents the old cliches in an amusing way, rarely feeling tired. I found the plot to be very fun, as a foreign spin on the classic Pygmalion tale. It's always entertaining seeing different classes mix, and as these movies show, it's always the lower classes who are the more honourable people.

For the majority of its runtime, Çam Sakızı is one of those rare movies where there doesn't seem to be any conflict, and the writers are content with simply telling a = story with their characters. There is the stuff with the shady doctors of course, though that's mainly for comedy and doesn't really make up a whole lot of time. Kind of a disappointment really. It kinda fizzles out and disappears after a while, without much conclusion. Things do get shaken up in the climax, naturally, with your everyday third-act break-up. This was pretty frustrating to me. I suppose my problem with this development isn't necessarily that it happens period, but that it comes so late in the film, and this also necessitates its speedy and hurried resolution. It only takes like 5 minutes, not counting the musical number!

Where the movie feels/falls a little flat is in the romance. At the movie's beginning, Adnan is with another woman, happily pawing at her boobs, and yet is expected to ditch her and fall in love with Mihriban in only a matter of days. I'm not quite sure what she'd want with a Casanova/Lothario like him, but oh well. He only really starts falling for her after the transformation (that is, the last half hour), and that leads into the next big problem, which I'll get into/address below.

Mihriban is a very natural protagonist, a salt of the earth woman in personality and appearance, with a cute innocence to her, as well as a striking head of red hair. That all changes after she goes on a special trip though, and comes back an uber-fashionable blonde, slathered in make-up. She obviously still looks good, but it feels like something is lost with this make-over. And this of course isn't helped by Adnan only falling in love with Mihriban after she's undergone a big make-over. So he couldn't care less before, but now we're expected to believe he's earnestly in love with her just because he likes blondes? I freely imagine he'll dump her if she goes back to being a redhead. I also imagine she'd kill him is such an eventuality arose.

Hulusi is an entertaining presence, grumpy to those who deserve it, and nice to our heroine. He doesn't get a whole lot to do in the [film's] second half, but not nothing though, as he doesplay a big role near the end.

The villains are a varied bunch. We've got the vampy girlfriend Mine, and the two doctors, who are like a Turkish version of Lenny and Squiggy. Whether that's good or bad depends on you, They're amusing enough even f they're clearly not a threat. Mine though causes some trouble!

The acting here is all good. The leads all deliver fine performances, with Emel Sayın being a standout as the cheeky, but adorable and wholesome heroine. Hulusi Kentmenn is also funny as usual as his typical blustering yet good natured self. Engin Çağlar is a good romantic lead. His moustache may be nothing compared to his co-star's, and he's pretty standard, but does a perfectly fine job.

Işın İşsever(?) is fine as the kid, never being annoying or bratty. Ceyda Karahan plays the bitchy girlfriend to a tee, making you love to hate her. And lastly, Mete Inselel and Cevat Kurtuluş are mixed as the comic relief. Some might loathe them, while others might find them funny. I'm somewhere in the middle. As someone who's suffered through Dr. Goldfoot and the Girl Bombs, I've had enough bad foreign comedy relief pairings to last me a lifetime! Compared to that movie, Inselel and Kurtuluş are like Abbott and Costello!

Not only does Emel Sayın perform her duties as an actress, but a singer too. She performs a few numbers, getting as much mileage as she can out of her character's nightclub occupation. She does well   and I give props to her for being animated during these performances, rather than just staying still as a statue.

The direction is quite good for the most part, and some shots look quite stylish! The nightclub performances are choreographed well, and the romantic scenes are shot nicely. The only complaint I had was there are a couple of scenes where Mihriban is watching Adnan and his girlfriend, and it's a bit hard to tell where she is in relation with them, and how they can't see her if she's right there (wherever 'there' is). Lastly, there's some very beautiful location work here!

The music here is quite nice. There's a fun instrumental theme for the intro, that recurs at a decent rate, acting as a good leitmotif. The songs all mix with the action well, and are spaced out decently, never too close or too far apart.

If you're new to Turkish cinema, or just keen on romances, Çam Sakızı is a great time to be had. Not perfect, but a great example nonetheless.

A Bride for Henry (1937)

Monogram Pictures is often derogatorily referred to as a poverty row company, but I feel this is an unfair way of looking at it. This was a company that specialised in lower-budgeted entertainment and never tried doing anything else. Rather than use their meagre budgets on lavish productions, they'd use it on productions where they could make their funds count. For example, their romantic-comedies were consistently great, among the best of the 30s and 40s! They may not be as well remembered as the A-pictures of the time, but they're just as worthy of attention. Case in point, today's film, A Bride for Henry...

'Blushing' bride Sheila Curtis is monumentally pissed off at her groom Eric for not showing up to their wedding on time. Wishing to teach him a lesson and save face, she decides to marry her faithful lawyer Henry Tuttle, who's = confused by what's happening. Faced with a new bride who treats their married existence as a mere formality and eager to forgive Eric, Henry decides to teach the two a lesson, and show Sheila who's really worth holding onto...

A Bride for Henry is a hilarious picture! Running at a short 59 minutes, it packs a full plot in that time that entertains thoroughly, and is always quick with a laugh,

The characters here are great. They have tons of personality, and each one is distinct from the other

Harry is likeable and snarky, and is the one the audience roots for. The poor guy can't catch a break with what he's drafted into, but thankfully he's clever and resourceful enough to turn things around. The film never explains what exactly he did or didn't orchestrate, but at least some of the problems that befall the grouchy couple have gotta be his doing, and it's a = to watch.

The best character in this film is Sheila. Always manic and vibrant, her   can be seen  how they/she treats the milk truck that gave her a lift like he's a chauffeur, [because she doesn't like the idea of being a hitchhiker]. Eric acts like a romantic, but is an absolute ratbag, missing his wedding because he fell asleep at a movie theatre,  and not seeing/unable to see why that's a big deal. He's clearly a dickhead, but not so much that it's unbearable to watch. It's funny seeing the comeuppance the poor schmuck keeps getting/going through.

I especially liked Henry's friendships with women! For a movie from this period to show a man and woman just being friends is great (hell, it's still rarely seen nowadays!). The Countess Van Orden is a nice character. Far from being a stuck-up rich lady, she's a pal and gladly helps Henry with his plans. She also might have an unrequited crush on him, just to add a little depth, Really the only issue with her is that she could've had more to do.

Even the minor characters have plenty of life to them, from the [aggrieved] kids, to the cheating farm-owner/sheriff, and the gaggle of women that follow Henry around.

The important thing in a movie like this is for the mean partner to be bad enough that they're deserving of a punishment, but not so much that they're unlikeable. A Bride for Henry strikes a great balance. We can understand why Henry's fallen for her while also aknowledge she's a bit of a bitch [reverse]. In fact, what helps is that the film itself acknowledges this. Henry is never presented as naive.

Something I like about A Bride for Henry is that the romance makes sense. A good comparison would be The Proposal, with Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds. Now I like that movie, but it is just a little silly that these two that can't stand each-other just so happen to fall in love after pretending to get engaged. Here though, Henry is already in love with Sheila, and she is certainly fond of him, depending on him for everything, so you can definitely see where the romance comes from (again, not that I dislike the romance in The Proposal, it's sweet even if it's [silly!]).

The ending is a little disappointing though. It's all well made, and it's not badly written for what it is, it's just that what's happening is one of those endings where the writers didn't really think things through and notice how serious what they were writing was. Also, it's not really as nice to end the movie on, considering how abruptly it stops after that. It's still sweet, with a romantic kiss, but not great.

The pacing in A Bride for Henry is quick, understandable given its short length. It might be too quick for some, as problems are resolved very quickly, whereas a modern day movie would drag out these relationship issues for another hour or so. That's too long for my tastes, but at times this was just a bit too short.

The actors here do very well. Anne Nagel is the best with her wacky performance, equal parts manic and funny. Warren Hull is a great straight man, and Henry Mollison is equally amusing as the troublesome fiancee. Everyone else do god jobs, including the two kids in that one scene, who really sell it.

For such a small production, the direction is just as good as anything higher-budgeted, and each shot is very well composed. There's a lot going on too, whether/either in the background or foreground. Enough to be vibrant without being overwhelming. The locations are overall pretty neat too, and make you yearn for a nice holiday like this.

The music is another downside here, as there pretty much isn't any, besides the wedding march at the beginning and end. The movie's good enough to stand on its own without music, but there are some scenes that really could've done with it.

Overall, A Bride for Henry was a surprisingly good watch! For the most part I really enjoyed myself, and definitely recommend it if you're a fan of rom-coms.